Lying to Ourselves
Far more damaging than lying to others is the act of lying to ourselves. This far-too-common behavior of telling ourselves self-defeating lies often has more repercussions than we realize. Below is a lists of eight of the more widespread subjective “truths” (lies) that we often tell ourselves.
- I’m not smart enough to do that.
- I’m too old to change.
- I’ll never be any good at this.
- Rich people are cold and cruel.
- You need money to make money.
- Nobody understands me.
- I’m too young to be successful.
- Life is hard and then you die.
Take another look at the list above and see if any of these statements sound like something you might have ever told yourself. Now, let’s dissect each statement to see if it’s completely true or merely one way of looking at things. After each statement and explanation, I will provide a question which can be used to prompt your brain (specifically your Reticular Activating System RAS]) to search for a solution rather than to dwell on a self-destructive thought.
– I’m not smart enough to do that. Is it that you are not
smart enough, or have you simply not put forth enough
effort? Maybe you realized how much work it is was
going to take and you are simply not interested any
longer. Or maybe you are merely struggling because
you have your head stuck into the middle of a problem
instead looking outside of the problem for a solution.
Instead, ask yourself:
How can I continue to attain the knowledge needed
to accomplish my goals quickly and easily?
– I’ll never be any good at this. Can you know with any
certainty that you will never be good at something?
You may become good if you stick with it long enough.
You may not be good now, but that is no excuse to give
up hope. Who knows, an invention may come along
that makes it possible for you to accomplish something
extraordinary which, before its invention, seemed completely
undoable. Becoming an expert at something is
often a sequence of making every mistake possible within
a limited discipline. Instead, ask yourself:
What is the next step I can take to swiftly improve
my skill level?
– You need money to make money. While it can definitely
help to have start-up capital when creating a service
or product, you do not absolutely need money to get
started. Contrary to popular belief, most millionaires in
the United States are self-made millionaires and started
from humble beginnings just like you and me. If your
invention or idea is solid and your motivation is great,
you can always find a way to get started before you have
any funding. This is commonly known as “bootstrapping.”
Or, you may find an investment partner to lend
you the capital required. Instead, ask yourself:
How can I create more wealth now while increasing
my long-term earning potential?
– I’m too young to be successful. This is an excuse that
is often used to delay the creation or implementation of
an action plan. Due to the information available at the
touch of a button either online or in the realm of technology,
young adults have an ever-increasing opportunity
to creatively express themselves, create wealth, start a
business, learn a trade, etc. And because success does
not hold the exact same meaning for any one person,
one must also define what success means to them (on
both a personal and spiritual level) before success can
be attained. Only in this manner will they know when
they are acting in accordance with their purpose (as
opposed to simply chasing riches) and can then move
forward toward their personal vision of success. Instead,
What can I do right now to further accelerate the
speed at which I travel along my path to success
while staying aligned with my purpose?
– I’m too old to change. While it may be discouraging for
someone who sees themselves (or who society sees) as
older to witness the ever-accelerating world of technological
advancements, it is never too late to change or
adapt. As a so-called “older” person, you may not have
the energy that you did a decade ago, but your experience
can easily make up for your lack of mobility and/
or energy. Using your ideas and knowhow, you can find
a way to learn new ideas in an organized and fun way.
There is a saying that states, “The more things
change, the more they stay the same.” This statement
reflects the fact that although technology moves us “forward”
at an exponential rate, there are certain things
in life that do not have to be relearned. These universal
truths have always been true and will always be true.
Use this knowledge and experience as your baseline as
you continue to learn and grow. Instead, ask yourself:
How can I more quickly and easily adapt to the
– Rich people are cold and cruel. It may be true that
some people get rich by stepping on others in their
“no mercy” race to create or extract wealth. However,
there are also people who become rich by helping others
succeed. Some even donate a large portion of their
riches to charities and non-profit organizations. There
are always many different roads that lead to success.
The road you choose is entirely up to you. While some
individuals may accumulate riches through being cold
and cruel, they will never truly be wealthy unless they
learn to give back to society. Remember that wealth has
little to do with monetary numbers and more to do with
the whole of the path you take. Instead, ask yourself:
How can I generate larger passive income streams
while helping others to realize their dreams?
– Nobody understands me. You must take responsibility
for your own communication skills. If other people
do not understand what you stand for and what you
want out of life, maybe it is not their listening skills,
but rather your communication skills that lack clarity.
If you feel lost in life or baffled by your own actions,
how do you expect others to know you? As you begin
to know yourself better, both mentally and spiritually,
you will learn to project the correct image to others.
How they then receive this image is up to them and their
own experiences, filters, and expectations. Instead, ask
How can I better project to others the passion and
integrity that make me who I am?
– Life is hard and then you die. This statement is the
root belief of so many people and yet so many others
around the world prosper quite easily even in the face
of economic distress and natural disaster. If you take
the time to search, you will find that there are people
in this world who live and love as easily as they breathe
in spite of their immediate circumstances. They accomplish
more with less effort because instead of fighting to
swim upstream, they fl oat effortlessly with the current.
Instead, ask yourself:
What can I do to create a more effortless lifestyle
that is both peaceful and fulfilling?
As we have been discussing, you must create space between your thoughts in order to find your spirituality. Telling lies and/or manufacturing negative thoughts encourage the opposite effect because they fill your mind with the clutter of a thousand toxic or unhelpful thoughts … none of which are exactly the truth. Starting right now, pay attention to the subjectivity of truth and you will find yourself on the fast track to spiritual enlightenment.